Did the Holidays Reveal Your Elderly Parents Need Help? Here's What to Do Next.
- Client Care Assistant
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
If you're one of the many people who went home for the holidays, you may have discovered that your elderly parents aren't doing as well as you thought they were. Perhaps the house wasn't as tidy as usual, or you noticed Mom struggling with tasks that once seemed effortless. These observations can be unsettling.
Now comes the hard part: trying to figure out what to do next.
The Challenge of Acceptance
Aging parents and their children are often in denial that there is a problem. It's natural—no one wants to lose their independence, and admitting you need help can feel like surrendering control. For elderly parents, the idea of accepting assistance can be frightening and deeply personal. Meanwhile, adult children may struggle to see their once-capable parents in a different light.
However, the tasks of daily living can become overwhelming as loved ones age. It's important for family members to step up and address concerns when they arise—even if it feels painful or uncomfortable. The reality is that these problems will not go away on their own and usually need to be addressed in a timely manner before a crisis occurs.
Recognizing the Warning Signs that Your Elderly Parents Need Help
The burden often falls on the family to recognize the signs that an aging parent might need help with daily living tasks. This doesn't necessarily mean your loved ones must move to assisted living or a nursing home. Many seniors can remain in their homes with additional support, whether from family members, hired caregivers, or community resources.
The key is knowing what to look for. Sometimes the signs are subtle. Maybe the exterior of the house has peeling paint, or the driveway isn't shoveled. Once you enter the home, newspapers are still in plastic wrap and mail is piled up. Perhaps the house isn't as clean as normal or has an unusual odor. Trust your instincts—you can usually tell when something is "off."
Since a health crisis in the elderly can escalate quickly and catch everyone involved off guard, it's important not to ignore signs that something may be wrong.
Common Warning Signs
If you noticed any of the following during your holiday visit, it could be a sign that your elderly parents need help. It may be time to consider taking action:
Home and Personal Care
House and yard need care or maintenance
Broken appliances going unrepaired
Cluttered, dirty, and/or disorganized living spaces
Disheveled clothing or poor personal hygiene
Spoiled or expired groceries that don't get thrown away
Physical and Mental Health
Changes in mood or extreme mood swings
Depressed or low-energy temperament
Unexplained bruising
Trouble getting up from a seated position
Poor diet or significant weight loss
Forgetting to take medications
Cognitive Function
Forgetfulness or memory lapses
Uncertainty and confusion when performing once-familiar tasks
Missing important appointments
Loss of interest in hobbies and activities
Financial Management
Late payment notices or bounced checks
Calls from collection agencies
Unopened bills piling up
Safety Concerns
Unexplained dents or scratches on their car
Signs of falls or accidents in the home
Taking the Next Steps
The conversation about getting help doesn't have to happen all at once. Ideally, families will have ongoing discussions about getting affairs in order and planning for future care needs well in advance of any crisis. However, if the holidays revealed concerning changes, don't wait. Start the conversation with compassion, focusing on your love and concern rather than criticism.
At Kimbrough Law, we understand how challenging these family dynamics can be. If you need guidance on elder care planning, establishing powers of attorney, or protecting your loved one's legal and financial interests, we're here to help you navigate this difficult transition with dignity and care. Cal 706.850.6910 to schedule your family consultation.
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